Cyberjoke Friday edition v1.3

Let’s look at Will and Guy’s joke site today(08/14/2015):

http://www.guy-sports.com/humor/computers/computer_jokes.htm

  (image from guy-sports.com)

E-mail communication can always cause problems… 🙂

Mystery Joke: (a bit dated …)

{Ricky, a customer, visits PC Express, the computer store, ‘I’m looking for a mystery Adventure Game with lots of graphics. You know, something really challenging.’

‘Well,’ replies the shop assistant, ‘Have you tried Windows Vista?’}

10 laws of computing  best 3 IMHO

1. The number one cause of computer problems are computer solutions.

2. When the going gets tough, upgrade your computer.

3. To err is human … to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human, its downright natural.

Microsoft’s employee of month (August)

{ Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.

The Personnel Manager said, ‘Mujibar, you have passed all the MCSE exams, except one. Unless you pass this test you cannot qualify for this job.’

Mujibar said, ‘I am ready’

The manager said, ‘Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green.’

Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, ‘Mister manager, I am ready’

The manager said, ‘Go ahead.’ Mujibar said, ‘The telephone goes green, green, and I pink it up, and say, ‘Yellow, this is Mujibar.’

Mujibar now works as a technician at a call center for computer problems. }

(All above jokes from Will and Guy’s joke site.

And for the final “Joke” of the day/Week – Defcon 23 edition:

Chris Rock’s DefCon23 pdf:  “I will Kill You & Birth You”

There is also a youtube video now of this presentation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9FdHq3WfJgs&feature=youtu.be

Chris Rock – promoting his DefCon talk

It is interesting that the death certificate process is the following in many countries:

Chris now details how he would actually fill out the forms in USA: California and Australia.

Apparently you can even upload “bulk” deaths in Victoria state government site.

Then lists several reasons for killing yourself:

Now of course the thing to do is … REBIRTH

Guess what to do now? hack the birth registration process…

How about a Virtual Baby?

I did not want to focus on the process of creating the legal papers for the baby, just the humorous meanings or maybe a bit weird actually.

Did you hear about the Shell companies?

How about Shell babies?

The funny thing is you can now “kill off” the shell baby and collect on insurance, a great vehicle for money laundering.

Nice DefCon23 talk Chris.